Help Meet Challenge 1

Remembering my job as help meet; cheerleader not guidance counselor.

We all know what it's like to hear a lesson and even practice it some and yet after time bad habits creep back in. It wasn't intentional. It was many times motivated by true sincere desire to see the one you love happier.

But sadly it is also many times motivated by desire to look better yourself. You may think how is that? What does my reputation have to do with it? Many times we pressure those we love to improve certain areas of their lives because having a successful husband makes a wife look better.

Maybe even because you have a certain standard for your own self that you feel is somehow diminished if you can't make him uphold it also.

Most times whether sincere or motivated by selfish desires and pride we convince ourselves that if we loved our mate we couldn't sit and watch them struggle. If we have in our mind the helpful advice they need to be successful how could we hold it back. This thinking is what leads us to confuse our real role as a help meet.

I have been meditating on two different quotes I have heard or remembered recently.

"It's not my job to make my husband successful, it's my job to make him happy."

"Be your husbands cheerleader. Tell him all the positive and tell the rest to the Lord. He has a whole world out there to correct, critique and discourage him. Only you can be his faithful cheerleader. Do what no one else can do."

These are both such powerful truths. I've heard them both in different variations over the years but only sin nature creeps in and the "I know better" attitude. And the thought, "how can anything work out if I don't speak?". What lack of faith is packed into this little statement. Do we really believe our voices are more powerful in our husbands life than the Lord. Many times if your like me we feel helpless because if we do choose to hold our tongue we hold it with the Heavenly Father too. We bottle up our concerns and criticisms. Instead of abounding with positive speech to our spouse and pouring our concerns out to Christ, we say nothing at all to anyone. We hold our tongue but generally both husband and Christ know our true feelings anyways.

So help meet challenge is this. Let's filter out the negative and instead say every positive thought that comes to mind. Let's bring all concerns, frustrations and maybe even dissapointments to the one who has all power. God has the power to make ALL right. Believe it or nor I would say that many times when I do bring these things to Christ he points out that my opinions on my spouses perceived transgression or short comings aren't right at all. If not I feel more filled with compassion and desire to lift him up in prayer and reveals all I have to be positive about. Which sadly I should do much more than I do. But no matter who is right and who is wrong (which generally it isn't 100% one or the other) If I bring it to Christ he can give peace and his perfect will (which is hardly ever exactly what I predicted in my fleshly wisdom it should be).

Lord, help me love, appreciate and cheer on the wonderful, faithful and good man you gave me. Help my lips to abound with praise and to not neglect to bring my struggles to you. Help me not to try to make him perfect but support and appreciate all the good he does.

 

 

 

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